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We are two working mothers — Lauren Rose, the director of business development for Name Bubbles, and Betsy DeMars, the assistant managing editor at The Saratogian. Try as we may to be really good at both, balancing motherhood and career can get pretty messy. As professionals, work schedules and mommy schedules often collide. So, we plow through, hoping at the end of the day, our kids — Lauren's 5-year-old son and Betsy's 11-year-old son and 9-year-old daughter — know how much we love them.

Monday, January 3, 2011

You're not my best friend anymore

Apparently, I'm not the only one hearing this from my four year old (phew!).

Our family went skating this weekend with friends who also have a four year old son. So when my mom friend and I had a minute to catch up between the skating rink and the bouncy-bounce, we discovered we had both heard "you're not my best friend anymore", "you're not my good mommy" and the dreaded "I'm not listening to you. You're a mean mommy" recently. [Insert collective sigh of relief here]

As a mom, words like that make you feel as though a million little heat seeking missiles are piercing your heart. What? You don't think I'm the best thing since sliced bread? No?

Well, that's because I'm not your best friend. I'm your mom.

My friend and I share the same sentiment when it comes to responding to the "you're not my best friend, mommy" kind of kid backtalk. It's simply not our job to be our boys' "best friends". Our collective responsibility as moms is to raise kind, generous, well-mannered young men. Sure they're cute enough (and turns out clever & bold), but that's not enough. These boys will someday (hopefully) be a great boyfriend or the husband of some girl's dream.

For now, our little guys are all ours. But someday, they'll be so much more than that. Teammates, students, roommates, boyfriends, employees, husbands and - dare I say - fathers. Although it's hard to believe, our little "talks" about the importance of manners, respect and kindness may just make a difference. We're counting on it.

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